Hello, I'm Paul and I've come to the realization that me and alcohol no longer get along. When I start drinking, I cannot stop, despite how many times I tell myself I'm only going out for just a couple. I've lost that battle 99 out of 100 times. I've tried to set boundaries on my drinking like never drink alone, and not before 5pm but several times found myself drinking alone well before 5pm. When I'm not drinking, I feel fidgety, contentious and anxious which eventually leads me back to the bottle. After grappling with alcohol for over a decade and a summer from hell in 2014, I decided on September 7th 2014, I HAVE to stop drinking. The Recovery Elevator Podcast is a medium to help keep me sober in addition to helping others struggling with alcohol quit drinking and maintain a healthy recovery. Don't make the same mistakes I did in early recovery. Hear from guests who are successfully navigating early sobriety. It won't be easy, but you can do this.
Asaph, with over 6 weeks since his last drink, shares his story…
A link to the mentioned Russell Brand podcast episode with Gabor Maté.
Gratitude, what is it good for?... everything.
Gratitude is a topic that needs to be continually covered in recovery. It’s a box in recovery that will never be checked, because it is ongoing.
How do we create a mindset of appreciation? Apply some conscious attention to the things in your life that are there for you, whether it be people, or your left elbow. Don’t take things or people for granted. Remove or avoid the sources of negativity in your life.
Gratitude is good for our brains. It positively stimulates the hypothalamus. We can’t function without grace. We are wired to be a grateful species.
It’s easy to be thankful for the good things in our lives, but what about the not so good times? Gratitude can help us get through life’s challenges. In fact, we can even become thankful for them. Challenges and obstacles become our teachers and often send us on paths we wouldn’t always go down on our own.
We can, and must, find joy in everything.
[11:58] Paul Introduces Asaph.
Asaph is 37 years old from Windsor, Ontario. Sober for over 6 weeks. He was raised in a cult called “The Children of God”. He lived in India, and had 5 children. He and the wife split, and that’s when he began to drink heavily. He’s a waiter, though he pursues art as a professional career.
[16:15] Give us a little background about your drinking.
He began to hit the bottle hard when his marriage fell apart. He was around age 31 when he had his first drink. He left the cult around 28. He remembers alcohol being a guide, allowing him to be himself. When he explored recovery, he learned that he had a lot in common with other people. He tried to moderate, etc. He would black out and swear that he would never drink again. He found himself going against his word.
[23:13] Did you experience a rock bottom moment?
He feels that he had many. He realized that rock bottom was a moment when one decides that enough is enough.
[25:20] How did you finally end up quitting?
His sister helped him sign up for rehab. She convinced him that he had a problem. He had many relapses. He realizes that he can learn from them.
[30:30] What are some of the lessons you have learned in relapse?
We need one person to be 100% vulnerable and honest with. He needed to get out of his own head a bit. He finds it spreads into other relationships as well.
[32:45] What is a typical day in your recovery look like?
He listens to recovery podcasts. He enjoys Cafe RE. He recognizes when he wants to feel isolated. His default setting is alone. He needs human contact to keep a more positive perspective.
[35:51] Have you figured out why you drank?
It was his default coping mechanism for everything.
[37:10] What have you learned about yourself in recovery?
His recovery is directly connected to his entering the public world. Drinking became the way he discovered the outside world. He wants to get his business up and running. He feels like he can do anything that he puts his mind to.
[39:40] Have you had any cravings and what do you if they appear?
He believes cravings don’t last more than 20 minutes. They used to paralyze him because he thought they were forever.
[40:50] Rapid Fire Round
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free
Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to [email protected]
“We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!”